Thursday, July 8, 2021
My beloved cousin Tony, I still can't believe you're no longer with us. All I can think about is us being kids. Watching cartoons after school or Godzilla marathons on holidays when school was off. I remember us play fighting and pretending we were karate masters after watching wrestling and kung fu flicks on Saturday mornings on channel 5 in abuelita’s house. Vicente and abuela would yell at us to stop playing around, only for us to start up again whenever they weren’t looking. I'm sorry we never got to meet up and have those beers we always spoke about having whenever we would finally get around to catching up on the phone. These last two years have been very tough and presently more than ever, I see even more that life is indeed way too short. The days we always look forward to are not promised and are never to be taken for granted. I know now more than ever that we are living on borrowed time and that all we have good in our lives are our family and those we choose to let into our lives and love unconditionally. I never would have thought that you would leave so soon. You were full of life, love and happiness. You were a kid at heart. You were always family oriented and always seeking out family to talk to no matter how busy and hectic life could be. I will always remember you as the cousin I grew up side by side with. Our uncles or moms picking us up from school and all of us walking home together, goofing around and us just being kids. I'll never forget our adventures whenever our families would meet up at state parks for barbecues and picnics. We would venture off getting lost in the woods of George Washington Bridge Park like we were little Indiana Joneses. Thinking we would find a secret world, lost treasures or even encounter some monsters or new species of creatures or animals never before seen. I remember those days like yesterday because those were some of the best times of my life and I don’t really get to re visit those experiences anymore in my adulthood. You were never judgmental of anyone’s imperfections or bad decisions. You were just you. Supportive and down for whatever without any complaints. You were my cousin but you were also like my brother, my comrade and my best friend. With every passing of a loved one I experience, I feel that a piece of my soul has been taken. As painful as that is, I except it and give it up willingly in hopes that when my day finally comes, I will rejoin everyone and those pieces of my soul will be returned to me, therefore making me whole again and thus diminishing this pain once and for all. The toughest part now will be bearing the pain and sadness of not having you around, to reminisce and converse about our lives and about our favorite things nowadays. I will miss you a lot Tone. Know that you will always be on my mind and in my heart. That your spirit will always be welcomed in my home with doors, arms and hearts wide open. Rest in Paradise cuz. I love you always. Your Cousin, Ray
